Sunday, July 23, 2006

In Loving Memory




The most difficult times in my life were saying Goodbye to 3 people I loved the most.

Shortly after Nelson and I graduated,Mom,Dad,Nelson and I went to Ameliasburg (south of Belleville) to visit my one and only dear Uncle Kenny,Mom's brother. He was at the end stages of cancer.

His face just lit right up when Mom and I walked in the door. Since Mom and Dad had were still seeing each other,it was the first and last time Uncle Kenny met Dad. (He was her 3rd hubby and the best Dad I ever had.) They were married March 27,1998.

Uncle Kenny and Aunt Beth were very happy to see us. We sat at the kitchen table for hours talking and laughing. Uncle Kenny also had a big,beautiful German Shepherd named Thor,who welcomed Nelson happily. I think Thor thought he was a lap dog as he loved to rest his forelegs on my lap! I come from a family of dog lovers so for me to have Nelson is as natural as breathing.

Nelson knew Uncle Kenny was dying. He laid at his feet the entire time he sat at the kitchen table. I believe he knew before the rest of us did.

Uncle Kenny hated hospitals and had a hospital bed in the living room. He wanted to die at home. It was just Aunt Beth,myself and the dogs in the house when Uncle Kenny passed away on Sunday,June 2,1996.

Mom and I were smart enough to pack dresses so we were prepared "just in case." I honestly believe he waited for us before he died.

The funeral home in Belleville was wonderful. They welcomed Nelson warmly. He was at 3 visitations as well as the funeral service and accompanied us in the family limo to the gravesite. He was so well behaved.I was very proud of him.

Exactly 3 years and 4 days later,on June 6,1999,I lost my beloved Mom to cancer. I was the only child she had that lived so we were very close. She and Dad were only married for 15 months. They were the love of each other's lives and sure made the best of the time they had,but of course we all wanted more.

While she was in the hospital having a chemo treatment,she told me."Crystal I know this cancer is going to get me one day,but don't you ever feel guilty,you've always been a good daughter to me." Then,while still holding my hand,she looked down lovingly at Nelson sleeping at our feet and told me." I always wanted to donate some money to Hearing Ear Dogs and I couldn't. When I die,one of the charities I want donations to go to is Hearing Ear Dogs of Canada." Her wish was granted.

Dad and I were with her in her hospital room when she took her last breath. Nelson again joined me for her visitations,funeral service and reception. I was so bereft after Mom died,if I didn't have Nelson to take care of,I'm sure some days I wouldn't have got out of bed.

Then suddenly on May 21 2006,I lost my dear Dad to a heart attack. It was a terrible shock,no one was expecting it. He had just turned 60 in February this year. He missed Mom so much,I think he died of a broken heart. Dad looked after me for 9 1/2 weeks while I recovered from emergency retina surgery. As I told me eye doctor this week"If it wasn't for the doctors and Dad's loving care during so many setbacks,I could be totally blind today."

I have some more pics to post,think I'll do that in a separate post so you can see them all.

Until we meet again......

Posted in loving memory of my Uncle -Kenneth George Kellar -August 23, 1942- June 2,1996

My Mother- Betty Lou (Allen) Howard- October 10,1939- June 6,1999

My Dad- Wm. Gary Howard- February 22,1946- May 21,2006.

Photos: Top : Mom and Dad Christmas 1998 (Her last). Center: Nelson and his Nana. Bottom: Mom and Uncle Kenny,taken March 1996.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Nelson, Wow - please tell your mom she has done a wonderful job on this blog! What a great tribute to the people who meant so much to her and what a super way to share such interesting lives (both yours and hers).
PS - very handsome picture of you!

Hope to see you Friday if you are feeling up to it!

Kathy

11:53 AM  
Blogger Nelliesmama said...

Hi Kathy,

I told Mommy what you said and she says"Thank you!" She says it made her feel better to write about our family. Thanks also for saying I'm handsome,Mommy tells me that all the time,LOL!

I really enjoy walking with you on Friday mornings. You are such a campassionate and kind person.Thanks so much for sharing your water with me. Boy,I get thirsty on those walks! That's one reason I come and sit near you when we have coffee and chat afterwards. I know you love me!

Mommy enjoys walking and talking to you too. You are a good friend Kathy.

I'll see how I feel on Friday. I hope I'm feeling up to coming as I love being there with Mommy,but she knows best.

Love always,

Nelson xxx

1:44 PM  

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